


A Hero Knows My Name

by William_Sipewalker



Category: Rogue One: A Star Wars Story (2016), Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Original Trilogy, Star Wars: Rebellion Era - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Bodhi Rook Needs a Hug, Canon-Typical Violence, Character Death, F/M, M/M, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-21
Updated: 2018-09-03
Packaged: 2018-12-04 21:46:39
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 20
Words: 13,186
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11563971
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/William_Sipewalker/pseuds/William_Sipewalker
Summary: Bodhi Rook survives. Somehow. But he has some doubts that he was meant to. It takes a lot of love, patience, and adventure to convince him otherwise. He has so much life to live.Luke Skywalker is on a mission to prove it.





	1. Survivor

Bodhi wasn't meant to survive— not really. He had survived so much already.

He'd risked it all to defect from the Empire, only to find himself jailed and tortured by those who were meant to help him. The supposed _good guys._

He'd survived the first AND second firing of a super-weapon, crash landing a U-Wing, being on the wrong side of an Alliance bombing operation, and infiltrating a seriously-fortified Imperial base.

Everyone he knew had died in the process. His family. His city. His sanity. His friends.

All lost. But not him.

For as delicate as his mind had become, the quick-thinking and reflexes required to grab the thermal detonator, throw it away from him, and scurry up to safety in the cockpit seems almost an impossible feat. He should be dead. 

But here he was, hiding in his newly-assigned bunk in the sweltering heat of Yavin IV. Utterly alone.

His incoherent muttering drew mostly sympathy from those around him— not that he cared— but it tended to keep the barracks near him clear when sleep wasn't required. But tonight the base was empty for a different reason. 

There was a battle raging the sky; a battle that Bodhi was trying desperately to forget. He willed himself to sleep for hours and hours in the dark.

Bodhi didn't sleep much anymore. He'd always been restless, but since Scarif his dreams were filled with spirits and monsters who wreathed and prodded and tortured his subconscious. It had warn him thin, and he could feel it. Killing him. But he was never meant to survive, anyway. So he endured.

He remained awake in his bunk when word came that the battle was over-- the Death Star had somehow been destroyed! He thought it would make a difference— that he would somehow be relieved of all the pain he'd been carrying. 

He thought he might cry. Or scream. Instead he just sat there, in his bunk, eyes turned down toward his rough, white sheets. Just staring into nothingness.

He stayed like that for hours; his back aching and his mouth dry. He almost willed a tear, but they were all gone. All spent.

He flinched when the zooms of what little remained of the fleet woke him out of his daze. He heard yelling and cheers in the distance. Explosions. Maybe even fireworks. Every festival on Jedha had fireworks. As a kid, he had feared them. As a young man, he'd sat on a roof with his friends and watched them— their voices caring above the boom boom boom. As an imperial, he was trained to ignore them.

Bodhi had never been a good imperial. He did what he needed to survive, and in the end his friends had suffered and died because of it.

Fireworks reminded him of home.

Slowly, he crawled out of bed and toward the noise. Towards life. The red and green and gold glowed on his face as he walked in the dark. He didn't know it, but it was beautiful.

He saw them all on the landing pad. The pilots who had made it. The droids who chirped and beeped and spun in victory. The solitary soldiers who stood helpless in the dark, unable to move or feel the enormity of what they had won and lost. 

A man he had never seen before rushed at him through the darkness. Bodhi flinched, bracing for impact, but the man only looked at him with wild eyes and shouted "He did it! That Skywalker kid did it!"

He pressed on. The fireworks began to slow. As he entered the interior, he noticed how _empty_ the vast caverns seemed tonight. How much the Alliance had lost.

A crew of technicians passed by, carrying a beat-up R2 unit.

He followed them. Even if he couldn't celebrate, at least he could make himself useful. When he caught up to the rest of the crew, they stopped. Two of them just stared, mouths open. The other averted his eyes.

"N-need any help?" He asked awkwardly.

The crew remained silent for a second, but then the blue astromech beeped in the affirmative, somehow also conveying its annoyance at the delay.

That seemed to jolt the crew into action, and one nodded in the affirmative as the group silently moved toward the back of the ancient temple that served as Alliance headquarters.

Bodhi did his best to clean and repair the unit with the tools around him. A rather nervous golden protocol droid had eventually left him in peace after a somewhat extended argument with the astromech, whom he learned was designated R2-D2.

He worked mostly alone, with the crew called off to more important work and clearly uncomfortable being around him. He wondered when he had showered last. But then he looked at R2 and decided he couldn't smell worse than the greasy, dirty, feisty droid in his care.

It was late when he'd nearly finished; R2-D2 made good company even in its flustered state, but Bodhi's artificial knee was beginning to ache.

A few minutes of silent buffing passed before R2 let out an excited beep as someone politely cleared his throat behind him. Bodhi looked back, and standing right above him was the most beautiful man Bodhi had ever seen.

"Hi, I'm Luke Skywalker."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you enjoyed this first chapter! I have a few more written in advance, so I'll be posting a new chapter every day for a week or so. After that, I'm hoping for weekly updates.
> 
> Thanks for any kudos, comments, or feedback!


	2. Golden Boy

Bodhi didn't move. He just crouched there, eyes wide, next to the blabbering, beeping R2 unit that had become his only living friend in the past two hours.

But Luke wasn't listening to his droid. In fact, he seemed as transfixed as Bodhi felt.

Luke silently crouched down in front of him; their knees touching for a millisecond before Bodhi drew back an inch.

R2, who was clearly not used to being ignored, withdrew his third leg and rammed into him— causing Bodhi to lose balance and fall onto a bright-eyed Luke Skywalker, who caught him without losing his own dignity in the process.

They froze for just a moment, Luke's hand lingering on his arm for longer than what seemed strictly necessary. R2, clearly feeling no remorse for the awkwardness that Bodhi was currently enduring, reversed and left them to continue in silence as the base became quieter and darker.

"I'm Bodhi," he said finally.

Luke's eyes looked at him, searching. "You're Bodhi Rook. The pilot from Rogue One."

It wasn't a question, but Bodhi nodded as if it were a confession.

Luke didn't back away or scrunch his face in pity like most people did. Instead, he is eyes brightened with something akin to pride.

"You saved us out there."

At that, Bodhi stood, wiping his dirty palms on the pants of his uniform. He let out something that was meant to be a chuckle.

“I— I saved you? If I'm not mistaken, you're the _wizard_ who somehow shot at a 2-meter hole and landed it. You're the hero here.

Luke looked like he was about to argue, so he quietly added, "I'm just the pilot."

Luke raised a finger to retort, but at that exact moment none other than Princess Leia Organa grabbed Luke by the arm and insisted— in her fiery way— that Luke needed rest.

He turned back to Bodhi, almost shyly, and wished him goodnight.

"And thanks for looking after R2" he added, "I know that little droid can be a handful."

Bodhi gave a half-hearted wave as the hero and the princess turned toward their respective quarters, and left Bodhi standing in stunned silence.

_Luke Skywalker. Knows who I am._

He rubbed his head; his goggles feeling tight suddenly.

He looked around the nearly empty hanger. It was still here. The Death Star was gone. And Luke Skywalker knew his name.

He wandered back to his bunk as if in a trance— a situation that wasn't all uncommon. But this time, he was smiling.

His last thoughts that night were one name on repeat: _Luke._ He hoped he wasn't mumbling.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one is short but sweet. More to come soon!
> 
> Thanks everyone for reading!


	3. Nightmares

Bodhi kicked and kicked and struggled, but the monster would not abate. Its mucous-covered tentacles wrapped around him, pulling him ever closer to its horrid milk-blue eyes.

He screamed. He pled with the monster. Or Saw. Or anyone who could help him. Anyone at all.

His chest constricted as he felt the monster tighten its grip on his shoulders. With a firm shake, he lurched back into reality.

Bor Gullet was dead. He was here. He was _safe._

And-- he was looking at the pale, concerned face of a young pilot.

Bodhi tried to clear his throat to speak, but his mouth was so dry it came out a rasp.

The man, whom Bodhi now realized was just one of a half-dozen rebels standing around him, kept his grip firm but kindly.

"Hey man, are you ok? We heard you screaming." 

One of the female soldiers handed him a canteen of water. It burned down his scratchy throat, but he felt his strength returning.

Bodhi handed the canteen back to the woman, unable to meet her eyes.

She walked back to wherever she came from, and most of the small crowd dispersed with her. Until it was just Bodhi and the man in silence.

The pilot in front of him looked familiar; the base wasn't that big and Bodhi had bunked with a rotation of more than two dozen troops since he'd been released from medical.

Bodhi looked up helplessly, and the man smiled softly.

"I'm Wedge Antilles” the man quickly said. His eyes were serious but his face was kind.

"Bodhi. I'm the pilot—“ he replied almost to himself. Most of the base knew him and his misfortunes. He suspected the rest knew him from his peculiarities.

Wedges’ smile got a bit sadder. "I know."

"Are you gonna be okay?" he asked when Bodhi didn't reply.

Bodhi looked away, awkwardly fumbling with the sheets beneath his robotic hand.

"I'll be fine" he lied. He could almost hear the strain in his own voice.

Wedge stood up, but didn't back away quite yet.

Bodhi closed his eyes and sunk into his pillow. "I'll be fine" he repeated. He just needed to rest.

He opened his eyes a few minutes later, but Wedge was already gone.

Bodhi regretted not thanking him as he drifted off to sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Bodhi is gonna be okay. But maybe not tonight.
> 
> More to come.


	4. A New Hope

Bodhi had managed a few hours of peaceful sleep before he was roused by the bases’ sirens. He immediately panicked, but a few of the people he recognized from earlier assured him that he was safe.

It was a ceremony in honor of those who had died in the battle against the Death Star. And those who had triumphed.

He was neither of those people, but the woman who had offered him water the night before silently insisted that he come along— if only by her expecting stance. She reminded him of Jyn, so he came.

The grand hall where they gathered was in the heart of the Yavin base. Countless rebel troopers, pilots, pathfinders, and factions lined to honor the many that had died in the fight against the Empire.

Princess Leia Organa herself presided, and Bodhi grew warm with the memory of her grabbing Luke’s shoulder.

_Luke._

Bodhi looked around, but didn’t see the golden boy anywhere. He was so distracted that it barely registered that Leia was speaking. Until faces began to look back at him.

“—would not have been possible without their countless sacrifices at the Battle of Scarif. Today we—”

He tucked a stray strand of hair under his ear nervously.

Suddenly Leia had stopped speaking. She was looking at him expectantly. They all were.

Those in front of him began to clear a path. A few wore encouraging smiles. Most had looks of pity. Or maybe of loss.

He bent his head down as he slowly moved toward the front.

Leia’s proud smile beamed down at him. He walked up the platform, back facing the crowd. His eyes were closed, but he could _feel_ them standing there.

They should have been with him. Jyn. Cassian. K2. Chirrut and Baze. The team of rebels that were with him on the beach. His friends.

But he was standing alone. They put a medal on over his head. Declared him a hero. Made it seem like it was all his doing.

But they hadn’t been there. They hadn’t seen him cower at Eadu. They hadn’t heard the righteous fury in Galen’s voice. The desperation. They hadn’t saved him as Bor Gullet unravelled his mind. They didn’t know he had stood and watched his world torn apart by a green beam of light.

They hadn’t watched him flee the second blast so fast he never looked back. He never looked back.

_He never looked back. He never looked back He never looked—_

Leia’s hand touched his shoulder, a gesture of comfort but also a signal to step aside. Even Bodhi’s frazzled mind recognized the power of her diplomacy.

He nodded to her quickly and moved off the stage. His eyes searched for a quiet escape. He managed to get all the way to the back before—

_Luke._

The shining, smiling flyboy struts through the door in a banana-yellow jacket. To Bodhi, he looks like the sun.

He and two others make their way to the front of the stage. They don’t need a grand speech— everyone knows what they accomplished.

Leia awards them three medals and they turn and face the room. The crowd cheers.

Even Bodhi claps, smiling a little. He’s alive. The medal weighs on his neck. He’s alive and the rebellion is saved and Luke is a hero. The real kind.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks everyone for their kind words and kudos!
> 
> I hope you enjoy this chapter-- more to come soon!


	5. Breathe. Just Breathe.

After they were dismissed from the ceremony, Bodhi barely resists the urge to dart out of the room immediately.

He wants to find Wedge, to thank him for the night before.

And he wants to see Luke, if only for a moment.

He made his way to the front, slowly. Friendly hands and tentacles and well-wishing crowd him as the rebellion emptied the long hall. Bodhi tries to smile politely, to burry his dread, but mostly either keeps his head down or stand on his toes to look for his targets.

What he hadn’t anticipated was to see Wedge and Luke together, arms around each other in embrace. The combination was overwhelming.

Bodhi shuffled towards them. The two broke their hug, and Luke immediately caught his eye. He smiled.

Bodhi weakly smiled back.

Wedge turned to him, and asked how he was feeling "after _last night_."

“Better, thanks.”

Bodhi looked at him.

“And thanks for… helping.”

Luke looked confused but didn’t inquire further, to his relief. Instead, Luke reached up and felt the long band that Bodhi now wore around his neck. He hadn’t even looked at the medal yet, but Luke was fixated on it. The gold shined in his eyes as he leaned forward.

Bodhi held his breath.

“You deserve it” Luke said kindly.

Bodhi didn’t respond— couldn’t respond without making a scene— but Wedge quickly added “It’s amazing they’re building a memorial for your team. I hope it does them justice…”

At this, Bodhi’s eyes grew wide and his eyes darted between the two men in front of him and the stage. Princess Leia must have announced that in her speech when he wasn’t paying attention.

A monument to his friends.

He could almost feel Cassian cringe and Jyn smile. He could see Baze and Chirrut arguing about it, and K2 making some snide remark about honoring droids.

Bodhi was a million miles away when Luke finally put a hand on his shoulder.

“You okay?” he asked, concern in his bright blue eyes.

Wedge glanced at Luke with curiosity before turning back to Bodhi, a concerned look in his eyes.

Bodhi nodded quickly but then turned and walked away. Maybe ran. He couldn’t remember.

All he knew is he found himself out of the temple. In his bunk. Both hands around the googles resting on his forehead. He lay there, trying desperately to ignore the sunlight and the humidity and the thought of another day lost to terror.

He shut his eyes tight and mumbled “I’m the pilot. I brought the message. I'm the pilot. I brought--” over and over again until it became a mantra. An identity.

******

It must have been hours later when he felt a hand softly perch on his shoulder. He tried not to flinch.

He slowly opened his eyes and looked behind him. He’d expected Wedge or maybe that woman with the water. But there was Luke Skywalker; his icy blue eyes cutting through the fog that had enveloped him.

He smiled, and Bodhi felt compelled to smile back. It felt more like a grimace. As Bodhi shifted his body towards him, Luke took the liberty to sit on the edge of his bunk. Not that Bodhi minded. It wasn’t his, after all. Nothing was.

Well, maybe Rogue One. But he hardly wanted that.

Luke looked at him with patient eyes. He was still slightly smiling, even though Bodhi had long given up the pretension.

“I just came to check if you’re okay. You left in a hurry back there.” Luke looked down, his brows turned in as if he was either deep in though or internally scolding himself. Bodhi didn’t know which he hoped for.

“I want you to know that you’re not alone” Luke continued after a moment. “We’ve lost a lot. I’ve lost a lot.”

Bodhi looked at him, suddenly more concerned for Luke than for his own fragile state.

“My aunt and uncle, first. Then my mentor. And… last night, I lost someone who I cared about. Biggs.”

Bodhi didn’t recognize the name, but put his hand on Luke’s nonetheless. “I’m sorry” was all he could manage.

Luke smiled at him, but his eyes were watery.

“I just didn’t want you to think you were alone.” He took a deep breath. “It’s the least I can do after you repaired R2.”

Bodhi’s stomach dropped at that, but he didn’t quite know why. It must have shown on his face, because suddenly Luke’s hand was there, resting on his jawline.

“I mean it.” Luke said with a little too much sincerity. His eyes shown intensely.

Bodhi quickly drew away from the pilot’s touch. It was too intimate. Too new. He lifted his legs protectively against his chest, arms rapped around his knees.

Even without the force, Luke could sense the shift. He stood up, shuffling from the bed a respectable distance. He put his hands in his jacket’s pockets and looked at his boots.

“Anyway” he cleared his throat slightly. “I hope you feel better.”

Bodhi didn’t reply— staring straight ahead. Eventually he heard boots shuffling towards the exit. He sighed.

_What the hell was that?_


	6. Into the Action

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter, as well as the next 2/3 chapters, is a major rewrite of the former Chapter 6: Transitions. Which I hated.
> 
> The plot-points are basically the same, but I felt like I rushed them and lost my focus. The new versions are worth reading I think, but we already know where this is going.
> 
> Sorry for the confusion! This is my first fic. :)
> 
> Enjoy!

Bodhi felt as if he were a ship drifting in space for months and years, and now suddenly launched into hyperdrive. His world had been small and contained since Scarif— purposefully so, since he and everyone around him seemed in silent agreement that he needed _time._

To process. To reflect. To heal his fractured mind and grieving heart.

But now time was up.

Since the destruction of the Death Star, the Yavin base seemed to spring into new life. The Alliance High Command was deep in talks of how to best build on the rebellion's new momentum as dozens of concerned citizens and disillusioned Imperials flocked to the cause.

Bodhi watched the first wave of new recruits with interest. Aliens from across the galaxy with wild eyes and a desperate pace who feared their homeworlds would feel the Emperor's retribution. Human families with missing members who travelled exclusively in clumps of five or more. Ex-Imperials who were betrayed by their posture, but who were no longer giving orders to anybody.

He wondered if they felt the crushing weight of their pasts as he did. By their posture, he secretly doubted it.

Wedge assured him that they all felt the guilt. He had made an effort to befriend Bodhi as much as one could, and Bodhi found that he enjoyed hearing voices outside his own head.

Wedge was nothing like Cassian. He was all smooth edges where Cassian was rough. He smiled more freely, even though he had lost just as much. And he knew Luke, and told Bodhi what he could about the Hero of the Rebellion.

When Bodhi finally received his summons, he’d been in the mess hall at a table near the back. He was alone, although this was hardly unusual. He could feel the weight of eyes on him as the messenger stated _a little too loudly_ that Princess Leia Organa requested his presence. He left his untouched food behind and followed the young woman to the High Command offices.

He sat in front of her desk like a sullen schoolboy; eyes in his lap and hands pressed together in some unspoken prayer. His mind raced with possibilities— he had taken too long to recover; he was no longer welcome here; was he sincere about defecting; what use was he to the Alliance now…

Leia reached her slim hands across her desk and into his sightlines. He looked up, his soft brown eyes meeting hers. She was almost startlingly close to him. Almost as Luke had been.

_Luke._

He scolded himself.

_No time for that now._

The last princess of Alderaan smiled at him. “I’m sorry this took so long” she said, finally. “I have been meaning to meet with you for days, but…” she sighed slightly and leaned back in her seat “the Alliance is in quite the rush these days.”

She was very beautiful, but Bodhi now saw how tired she seemed.

“I don’t— You don’t owe me your time.” was Bodhi’s weak reply. He was still uncertain of his purpose here, but he was now convinced that the summons wasn’t a dismissal.

She frowned. “Every hero of the Rebellion is worthy of my time. And you, Bodhi, have been through more than most.”

This woman, who had lost her entire _planet_ less than a week ago, felt sympathy for _him._ It was almost too much to bare.

She straightened in her seat. “I wanted to see if you were up for an assignment. I understand that you were a cargo pilot in your… former occupation. We have need of transport pilots for the new recruits, and I thought of you.” She paused.

“Of course, only if you feel you’re ready.” she said kindly.

Bodhi shuddered a bit, but managed to _mostly_ hide it.

He took a breath. “I’m ready.”


	7. Flight Check

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you missed the note on the new Chapter 6, I've rewritten the previous chapter and broken it into several new chapters that are more in depth (and have more Luke!).
> 
> The plot points will be essentially the same as the old Chapter 6, but I like these a lot better.
> 
> Thanks for sticking with me!

Bodhi held his breath as he neared the entrance to the cavern that housed various _acquired_ ships that suited the Alliance’s needs.

There it sat; its dark grey hull and four erect wings towering over every other ship in the vicinity.

_Rogue One._

He understood the need for stealth when traveling through Imperial territory, but he wished more than anything that there was another way.

He lowered the ramp and shivered as the ghosts of his past escaped the barren chasm .

The rebels had spent a bit of time repairing the interior that had been damaged by the thermal detonator, but the ship noticeably wore the scares of conflict. Just as he did.

He stepped onboard, just as something gold and orange flashed in the corner of his eye.

It was Luke. Even in his florescent flight suit, Bodhi could tell he was half-hiding; his movements were shy and devoid of their usual flamboyance.

Bodhi turned to him; eyes on the pilot’s black boots. “Hey” he almost whispered.

“Hi” the pilot said a little too loud and a little too quickly, as if he had been caught but wanted to seem casual.

“I heard you were leaving.”

It wasn’t a question, but Bodhi felt compelled to answer anyway. “Yeah, picking up some new recruits.”

He looked back at _Rogue One_ ; his face visibly upset.

Suddenly, there was Luke. A little too close again. His hand touching Bodhi’s gently.

“I just wanted to make sure you’re okay.” His eyes followed Bodhi’s to the ship’s grim interior. “Leia said that you were ready but I… just wanted to make sure. Wedge said you looked pretty rough this morning.”

Bodhi scowled.

“Not-not that you look bad. I think you look great.” The flyboy stammered. “I mean, not.. like that. But. I just wanted to make sure. That you’re okay.”

Bodhi looked at him. His face unreadable and his mind whirling.

Then he smiled. His hand tightened against Luke’s slightly. “I’m okay.” he said simply.

Luke smiled like the sun. “Okay. Okay, great. Good.” He backed away slightly, removing his hand from Bodhi's palm.

Bodhi found that he missed the warmth. His hand twitched in subtle protest.

“Well…” Luke continued, his hand now against his neck “I have a mission of my own so… I guess I’ll leave you to it.”

He started to walk toward the entrance, almost tripping over a GONK droid on his way.

He turned his head back and smiled bashfully.

Bodhi shook his head and smiled back. Suddenly the ship's expansive haul didn’t seem so cold, and Bodhi didn’t feel quite as alone.

He reached the controls and set a course to a neighboring system.

Time to get to work.


	8. Transport

The blue streaks of hyperspace were punctured by the sudden appearance of a massive, red planet. Bodhi was a little behind schedule, but he was still flying so high from his encounter with a certain X-Wing pilot that he'd hardly noticed.

The planet was technically under Imperial jurisdiction, but he found himself able to land _Rogue One_ in a remote outpost without any codes or questions asked.

He opened the ramp to find a human couple standing not five feet away. It was dusk on this side of the planet, but he could see their eyes were lit up, either in anticipation or fear. Bodhi almost wished for the latter.

He tucked a stray strand of hair behind his left ear before awkwardly motioning them to come aboard.

The couple stepped into the light, and Bodhi stifled a gasp. They were **both** stunningly beautiful. The man was tall, with olive skin and a firm jaw that commanded attention. His partner had a similar complexion, but with long, black hair and a soft but competent face. Bodhi was not usually one to be overly concerned with looks, but this couple took his breath away.

"Are you Kes Dameron and Shara Bey?" he asked, as if they could be anyone else.

The man smiled kindly "Call me Kes." Bodhi nodded at him as the woman stuck out her hand. "I'm Shara. And you are?"

Bodhi was grateful to finally introduce himself to an audience that wouldn't look meaningfully at him once he'd shared his name. "Bodhi Rook." he said simply. "I'm the pilot."

Shara smiled humorously at him, "Not anymore."

******

Shara Made quick work of the controls as she assumed the pilot's seat and raised the landing gear.

Having been relieved of his duties and reduced to co-pilot, Bodhi found himself enjoying the bantering company of the new recruits. He'd expected Kes to be hard and sullen like Cassian, but he found him to be quite warm and open. And Shara, along with being a take-charge pilot, was unmatched in wit and sarcasm.

The couple had clearly been through a lot together, and once they were safely in hyperspace, Bodhi pulled his knees to his chest and turned in his chair to better watch them teasingly insult each other and reference lives on a dozen different worlds.

"And don't think I've forgotten who got us into that mess in the first place!" Shara deadpanned. Kes raised his hands defensively, "I was only trying to help. How was _I_ supposed to predict that landing-party?"

They went on like this until the nervous energy they had been harboring since before they boarded finally subsided into a comfortable silence.

Then came the dreaded question.

"So Bodhi, when did you join the rebels?" The question was asked lightly, but immediately the room took a more serious tone. Bodhi tensed.

He briefly considered just lying to them-- crafting some tale about a innocent farm boy who had always hated the Empire and wanted the galaxy to be free from tyranny-- but he knew they would discover the truth eventually. Even if his trauma didn't soon give him away, Rogue One was the rebellion's second favorite story on the base.

"I was a cargo pilot. For the Empire." He started, speaking slowly to keep himself calm. They didn't react. "I defected trying to send a message." He stopped short. The rest of the story didn't bare telling.

"And did you?" Kes asked softly, "Deliver the message, I mean."

They both looked at him expectantly.

"Yeah, I guess I did." He turned his head down. "Just a little too late."

Shara reach over to put a comforting hand on his shoulder. "Hey." she said simply, "Sooner than us. We missed the whole adventure!"

Bodhi looked at her, incredulous that she could so lightly bare the burden that threatened to crush him.

"Just wait."


	9. Introductions

Bodhi prepared himself as the wave of dense heat fooded the cabin; the moister in the air was almost unbearable to a child raised in the desert.

Shara and Kes breathed in deeply as they took stock of their new home. The moon was mostly tropical, with dense forests and flowering plants in the distance. More immediately were the temples that formed the secret rebel base. A pilot made his way over toward them as they disembarked.

Kes stuck his hand out. “Kes Dameron, sir.”

Wedge smiled slightly and nodded, “Wedge Antilles, Red Squadron.”

He looked over at the beautiful, dark-haired woman a little too long, but only until he caught himself. Shara smirked and Kes grinned “Shara Bey. Excited to get flying with you, Wedge.”

Bodhi had finally stopped tinkering with the landing instruments and joined them on the duracreet. He half sighed and half moaned at he felt the full strength of the Yavin sun.

“Can we get inside?” he asked Wedge, and then looked at the other two.

Wedge smiled, knowingly. “Of course. I’ll take the new recruits if you want to give your report to the senior officers.”

Bodhi nodded, knowing he probably wasn’t expected to make a report for a routine transport haul, but grateful nonetheless for the excuse.

As he started to walk away, Kes touched his arm.

If he flinched, no one commented.

“Thanks for the ride” Kes said, a glint of something in his eyes.

Bodhi paused for a second, and then replied simply “I’m the pilot.”

Shara had a good-natured laugh at this. “Not while I was aboard.” They both smiled at him, and Wedge looked throughly confused.

“Maybe next time” Bodhi smirked, and walked towards Command.

******

After his report, which was succinct and basically could have been made over comms, Bodhi wandered around the base aimlessly. Or _supposedly_ aimlessly.

If anyone had asked him, he planned to say he was searching for Shara and Kes. Which was true, to an extent. But really, Bodhi’s heart was leading him another way. Toward a certain blonde farm boy that he knew.

_Luke._

He supposed he was still on his mission; Bodhi only had a quick transport while Luke was surely up to something more important.

He fidgeted with his goggles as he surveyed the mess hall. He saw a group of pilots laughing and shouting, but Luke was not among them.

And then he saw Shara strutting right toward the table.

So much for that excuse.

He looked around and spotted Wedge and Kes watching her steady march incredulously, a smirk on Dameron’s face.

Shara reached the pilots, plopped down at their table, and started speaking— loudly. Bodhi couldn’t quite hear what she was saying, but it seemed to rile up the pilots into an even larger frenzy than usual. At first he couldn’t see if it was a positive or negative reception, but eventually there was laughing and people slapping each other’s backs.

Then Kes sauntered over.

He didn’t sit, but stood on the opposite side of the table from his wife. The group got quiet, and Bodhi smiled at the idea of what Kes must be saying. After a short minute, Shara stood up and circled the table; taking her husband’s hand as they walked toward the entrance— and toward Bodhi, who had been staring for far too long.

He ducked his head a little as he caught their eyes, but they both smiled brightly at him and increased their speed in his direction.

“Hey, Bodhi” Kes said loudly.

Some of the pilots looked over at them.

“Hey” Bodhi smiled “what was that all about?”

Kes smirked and looked down at Shara, who laughed and held up her hands in defense. “I was just getting to know my crew.”

Bodhi nodded, his new friends sitting at the table he’d selected. Shara looked around at the mess hall thoughtfully.

“Why are you here, though? You don’t have food, and you’re alone.”

Kes elbowed him gently. “Waiting on anyone special?”

Bodhi looked nervously at his lap. He couldn’t very well say that he’d been looking for them this whole time now that they knew he’d been sitting here watching them.

He almost had to make his confession, but Wedge walked up and rescued him just as he went to open his mouth to mumble a few sorry syllables.

“Well, you seem to have made an impression” Wedge said, shaking his head. “Both of you.”

He sat down next to Shara, who smiled innocently as Kes grunted in the affirmative.

“Pilots are pilots” she replied cockily. “Same anywhere in the galaxy: easy to rouse and quick to speak.”

They all looked at Bodhi, who shrugged self-consciously.

“Well…” Shara quickly corrected, “most of them.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the delay; I moved back to school this week! Hoping to keep this going pretty consistently over the next few weeks.
> 
> Please let me know in the comments if you enjoy this, or if you have any comments/questions/suggestions!
> 
> Thanks for reading!


	10. Voices

Kes and Shara soon proved themselves indispensable to the rebellion. Shara was, of course, a star pilot among a fleet of star pilots. Even Wedge was silently impressed, Bodhi could tell. Kes was quickly designated as a Pathfinder after he scored perfectly in the simulation training.

Bodhi was happy for his friends, of course. But he found himself missing the luxury of time they’d enjoyed before they received their formal assignments.

He’d had the occasional pick-up for the Alliance, of course. But the pace of new recruits had begun to slow to a trickle— just as his friends began their work in earnest.

He found himself taking long walks to try and clear his head in the absence of friendly company. A gentle touch from Kes, a concerned look from Wedge… even the playful punches Shara awarded him from time-to-time were more affective. But they were all busy being the heroes the galaxy needed them to be.

And in this spare time, his mind often drifted to Luke.

_Luke._

He hadn’t been seen in at least a week. To Bodhi, it felt like a month at least. Wedge tries to talk him off a cliff when he catches the glimmer of fear in his eyes. But Wedge is in a different system.

It’s times like this when the sting resurfaces. His crew. _His_ rebels.

But they are gone. He has slowly come to accept this. His new friends have tethered him to the present.

He’s learning to cope.

******

He found himself drifting aimlessly through the towering temples of Yavin IV, he heard a commanding, far-away voice speak his name.

It was Luke. He was calling to him somehow. But as he looked desperately around, he realized that the voice wasn’t audible. It was coming from _inside him_.

He started spiraling. He was suddenly on the floor— a rebel with one of those strangely large helmets bending down beside him.

Bodhi shook him off. _It can’t be_ he mumbled desperately. He was _so sure_ the voices were gone.

But there was Luke. Calling his name from across the galaxy.

Of course, Bodhi had heard the rumors about the ace pilot— that he was some sort of ultra-powered force user. That he was a Jedi. That he was attached to some sort of prophecy.

It wasn’t that Bodhi was a non-believer. He had grown on Jedha, for Force sake, but he still had his doubts. Churrit was the closest thing he’d experienced to a Force user, and most of his abilities could be attributed to heightened senses and good reflexes. And Baze, of course.

But Luke was somehow different. _IF_ the stories were to be believed.

Now it seems they were.

He collected himself. The voice had stopped. But now another voice blared across the airwaves.

_“Lt. Bodhi Rook: Please report to High Command.”_

Bodhi looked at the soldier looking at him. He nodded, and made his way up.

******

Mon Mothma stood before him; regal has he had seen her in every Holo— even the Imperial ones.

She had greeted him quickly before she was interrupted by the same golden protocol droid that had pestered him on the night of the Battle of Yavin.

He was not intentionally listening, but he couldn’t help perking up when the droid mentioned a “mistress Leia” and “master Luke.”

It seemed they were on their way.

Mon Mothma turned back to him and smiled slightly. “I apologize for the delay, but I am hoping to assemble the entire team before briefing you.”

Bodhi looked puzzled. He reached up to his forehead, and found that his goggles had apparently fallen off during his… mind incident.

Suddenly the doors slid open and there was Han Solo, the smuggler-turned-Rebel who had helped Luke defeat the Death Star. He was arguing with Princess Leia, dressed in white and following a little too closely behind for the apparent annoyance of her face.

A few seconds later came Luke, wearing some sort of ridiculous poncho that somehow suited him even in the heat of Yavin IV.

Luke looked at him, smiling casually. “Miss me?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't know about you, but I certainly DID miss Luke!!
> 
> More to come..


	11. Mission Plan

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The next few chapters are going to intersect with the first part of Marvel's 2015 Star Wars comics. Major spoilers ahead. I really like the new canon, and I am doing my best to place Bodhi within it!
> 
> Hope you enjoy!

All eyes were locked on Bodhi, who resisted letting out a groan in the direction of his unwitting favorite pilot in the galaxy.

Han Solo had an eyebrow raised in his direction, while Princess Leia smirked almost knowingly. Even the protocol droid seemed to be waiting for him to speak, and Bodhi couldn’t even look to see the inevitable annoyance Mon Mothma was donning until she cleared her throat to end the silence.

Luke looked slightly embarrassed as they settled down for the briefing, but quickly made his way towards where Bodhi was sitting anyway.

Bodhi gestured to the chair beside him, which made Luke light up a smile once more.

******

A blue hologram of an inhabited moon circled in front of them as Mon Mothma explained their mission.

The premise was this: they would steal a ship from a Hutt convoy on its way to meet with the Empire about some clandestine affairs. They would get inside the Imperial facility, and destroy it.

Bodhi was utterly overwhelmed.

Impersonating smugglers and nefarious folk running errands for Jabba the Hutt was one thing. Bodhi had never been undercover as anything but an Imperial, but he was confident in his ability to keep his head down.

But the Weapons Factory Alpha on Cymoon 1 was right in the heart of the Corellian Industrial Cluster— a heavily occupied Imperial territory. It was one of the larger seats of Imperial military might!

Bodhi found his hands shaking as he tried desperately not be notably overcome until after the briefing. But every a time new detail of their plan became evident, the fear only increased.

Not only were they attempting to break into a heavily-guarded Imperial plant disguised as thugs and thieves; they were trying to **destroy it.**

His eye were wide as he realized just how perilous a mission this was. And for what? One weapons factory out of a thousand?

He felt a calming hand on his shoulder before it actually landed.

_Luke._

He was leaned towards him, eye looking up at his face in concern as Bodhi felt his breathing start to hitch.

In fact, the entire group seemed kind of stunned into silence. Han was leaning forward in his chair with two hands over his mouth. Princess Leia sat a bit too upright, even for her.

Luke only had eyes for him, but they showed concern nonetheless.

Mon Mothma, seemingly ignoring the obvious tenseness, simply asked, “Any questions?”

No one raised any. Bodhi wished someone had.

******

When Mon Mothma exited, everyone seemed to take a sigh of relief. The briefing had been intense, and most of the group had only just returned from another top-secret mission.

Han eventually broke the silence. “Well” he half-huffed, “another suicide mission.”

Leia scoffed quietly, but offered no real comfort. Honestly, she seemed just as concerned as the rest of them.

Han turned to his Wookie co-pilot. “You up for this, pal?” he asked doubtfully. The Wookie made some noise, but Bodhi couldn’t tell if it was in the affirmative or the negative. Han just nodded in response.

Luke turned to his friends “Well, we’d better get our costumes and IDs in place before we attempt this one.”

Han grunted. “Won’t need ‘em” he said simply.

Bodhi made motion to protest, but the smuggler continued, “All we need is weapons and a faster ship. You can take what we need clothing-wise from the crew.” He leaned back in his chair, suddenly looking confident.

“Besides” he grinned “I plan on going as myself.”

Bodhi and Luke looked at each other in dismay as the protocol droid attempted to talk Han out of it. Of course, it was was futile.

Princess Leia just shook her head. “I have a bad feeling about this.”


	12. Takeover

It was far too early in the morning to be arguing, but there Bodhi and his companions stood-- their anger undoing any attempt at stealth. Having only one ship and at least four pilots had quickly become a point of contention. Luke insisted-- rather pointedly-- that Bodhi be allowed to fly _The Falcon_ after the team overtakes the smugger's ship. Han insisted that it be Chewie.

"No offense, kid, but I don't know you from a bantha. _The Falcon_... she's best in the right hands."

Chewbacca growled in agreement.

Luke once again tried to protest, but it was no use.

Finally, Princess Leia, who had mostly been content to roll her eyes at both parties up until now, stepped between the two rival factions.

'Listen laser-brains, we don't have time to argue. Our rendezvous with a certain pirate ship is already too close for comfort."

Han grunted doubtfully, but everyone else bashfully nodded in affirmation. This had gone on long enough.

"Now get in," she stomped up the ramp "We'll decide on the way."

Han and Chewie followed after her-- Han shooting Luke a knowing look as he passed. Bodhi took a step to follow him, but Luke made a motion to hang back.

"Sorry, that kind of got intense" Luke shrugged. "I just don't like Han underestimating you."

Bodhi looked at Luke like he was made of gold. "--s okay." he said, still processing. "I don't mind taking a backseat on this one."

Luke looked at him searchingly, then nodded. The moment was over, and they both made their way into _The Millennium Falcon_.

Bodhi was almost tempted to take his hand.

*******

Luke, Princess Leia, and Bodhi sat in an oddly-shaped room with a line of equipment on one wall and a booth wrapped around some sort of circular table on the other. Luke and Bodhi sat across from each other in the leather booth, while the Princess sat at a chair near the computer modules.

Luke and Leia, as she insisted on being called, went over some of the finer details of the plan. Which basically consisted of Leia insisting that they come up with finer details of the plan and Luke assuring her that they would figure it out as they go.

As Bodhi watched the two interact, he couldn't help but think of them as two sides of the same coin. They were both so passionate and charming, but it manifested in completely different ways.

As Luke gesticulated more wildly, Bodhi also noticed the flyboy's feet shuffling closer to his own in a seemingly organic but far too consistent motion.

He withdrew his own. The mission would be dangerous enough without letting schoolboy fantasies get in his head. Besides, according to the rabid jealousy in Han's eyes, there was clearly something going on between Luke and the Princess.

A growl from Chewbacca awakened him from his introspection-- they'd found their target.

The blaster fire was intense; both ships were heavily armed and prepared to defend themselves.

Bodhi found himself rattled by the shaking haul as the micro-battle ranged on. Luke, sensing that Bodhi was troubled, scooted closer to him and put a hand on the shoulder. Leia barely concealed her smile.

Fortunately, _The Falcon_ had speed and the element of surprise. The firing soon stopped and Han came out from the cockpit with a smile on his face that was very close to a grimace.

He turned to Bodhi. "Kid, you've got the ship. Chewie'll show you the ropes. Just get her there in one piece."

Bodhi nodded. Han looked at Leia. "Ready, your highness?" Leia scowled but made her way to the exit. Han followed her, as usual.

Luke looked at Bodhi, clearly not ready to take his hand away.

"I'm glad you came." he said simply.

Bodhi smiled. "You're just happy Leia didn't have to bring her droid."

They laughed. And then Luke reached over and kissed him gently on the lips.

"See you soon, pilot."

And just like that, he was gone.


	13. Chaos on Cymoon 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I apologize for taking so long to write this chapter; grad school is currently kicking my ass into a galaxy far, far away from what I'd rather be doing. Which is writing this fic.
> 
> Thank you to everyone for your kind comments! This is my first fic, and I'm so pleased that you like it!
> 
> Stay tuned for more adventures! I'm trying to work this into my weekly schedule so I don't leave you hanging.
> 
> Enjoy!

Piloting the _Millennium Falcon_ was just like piloting anything else— if that anything was battered, makeshift, and falling apart. Bodhi was more than grateful that Chewbacca was there to help him (even if his growls all sounded the same).

 _The Falcon_ was scheduled to arrive well ahead of the captive merchant ship; enough space to downplay any possible suspicion. In the meantime, Bodhi had been instructed to make no contact with the rest of his team. Whether that was to prevent any possible interception or because Luke  & co. thought they might be unsuccessful, Bodhi didn’t like to think about.

In any case, all Bodhi could _really_ think about is that rash, brief, ill-advised kiss, as the starstreams flashed beyond _The Falcon’s_ cockpit.

 _Luke._ So impetuous and utterly charming. Part of Bodhi was torn between gushing sentimentality and confused anger. But most of him was just in shock. He knew there was a certain —fondness— between them. But kissing was well beyond fond.

Not for the first time, Chewbacca’s howl woke Bodhi up from his daydreaming, as the moon of Cymoon 1 stretched out before them.

The moon was heavily linked with the Imperial war machine, but it was not technically under occupation. Thus, they simply flew down to the surface, close enough that they could reach the outskirts of the factory if need be, but far enough away as to avoid any Imperial prodding.

Bodhi took a deep breath as _The Falcon_ jolted to the surface. Han could probably get a smooth landing out of this rust-bucket, but he was just grateful they made it in one piece.

But of course, getting in is the easy part.

He’d learned that.

******

Five hours later and Bodhi was alone and the world seemed in chaos.

Chewbacca had gone to scout a few hours ago— climbing some sort of tower between the ship and the factory.

An hour later, the hopefully-captured ship burst through the atmosphere and landed confidently on the facility’s dock. Bodhi thought to himself that only Han Solo could be so cocky. He hoped he was right.

Now, it appears he was.

There was laser-fire everywhere. Smoke on the horizon. An Imperial Lambda-class shuttle had arrived just a few minutes ago, and it appeared that everything had gone wrong.

Bodhi watched with terror— resisting the urged to crawl into the heart of the ship, as far from any windows as possible.

But his _friends_ were in that building, and he couldn’t take his eyes off of it.

He whispered a silent prayer for Luke. It was his first in a while, he realized. Chirrut would be pleased.

Suddenly, the tower that Chewbacca had climbed collapsed, as if some massive invisible hand had grabbed it.

He could almost hear the Wookie growl in the distance. But of course, that was impossible.

Bodhi fired up the engines.

Whatever was going on, he had to save them. He had to save _Luke._

******

 _The Millennium Falcon_ roared underneath him as he made his way to the wreckage. He had evaded Imperial notice thus far, but he doubted that would continue.

Everything had gone wrong.

The facility was on high alert. The Imperial holonet and radio frequencies were ordering the search of any unauthorized vessels in the area.

The ship rocked as blaserfire scorched the Falcon’s underside. They had found him.

_Bodhi. Help them._

Bodhi shook his head. He was imagining it. He had to be.

_Bodhi, please._

Suddenly a growl came through the radio. It was Chewie, asking for help.

Bodhi grabbed the transceiver. “Hang on, pal.” he told the walking furball. “I’m on my way.”

Up ahead, he sighted the Wookie and a dozen other assorted aliens.

What was he getting himself into?


	14. Escape from Cymoon 1

tBodhi had heard rumors about a dark man in a mask; a sinister enforcer of the Emperor’s will who crept on the edges of the galaxy.

What was walking toward him, with a squadron of white Stormtroopers behind, was nothing like a rumor.

It was terror.

He launched out of his seat in the cockpit and sprinted toward the loading ramp. He had to get there before _he_ did.

He was just about call out “Hurry!” when the sound of blaster fire stopped him dead in his tracks.

_He was here._

Screams echoed as a huddled crowd of a dozen or more species made its way toward _The Falcon_ , lead by a fearsome Chewbacca.

Bodhi had no idea where these creatures had come from, but there was no time to think. He watched as Darth Vader and his deadly entourage tore through them, spraying green blasts until there were barely six of them.

Chewbacca was first to the ramp, but he instantly turned around and drew his crossbow. Three Stormtroopers fell on the first shot. Vader deflected the next four with his blood-red blade.

Two reptilian-looking humanoids made it to the ship next. They looked at Bodhi, terrified. Bodhi could only look back at them helplessly.

One more alien died before all that remained made it aboard— raised with its feet off the ground and strangled without being touched.

Bodhi pounded the controls to the ramp as the Dark Lord drew ever nearer.

Bodhi and Chewie left the dwindled group near the storage area as they ran to the cockpit. Blaster fire rocked the ship, but the haul seemed to hold.

He knew what he had to do, but every part of his heart ached to do it.

He had to leave Luke behind. With that thing.

Chewie growled as his withdrew the landing gear, clearly worried about Han.

The last few blaster bolts made impact as _The Falcon_ rose above the facility. Chewie might be worried about Han, but Bodhi was worried about how the smuggler would react to seeing the new scorch marks on his ship.

As the facility grew smaller in the distance, Bodhi could hear the clicks and growls of alien languages behind him.

He didn’t know who they were, but now he was responsible for their safety.

He thought back to that voice in his head.

_“Bodhi, Help them.”_

If it was that important to Luke, then Bodhi would be damned if he didn’t do his best to help them.

Just then, _The Falcon’s_ alarms started to ding as a screen lit up red in alert. TIE Strikers. Three of them.

He knew he had to leave the atmosphere to get his new charges to safety.

He looked back at the facility, now far in the distance as they abandoned the fortified moon.

And just as he looked back, a massive explosion shot into the lower atmosphere and engulfed the facility in flames.

_Luke._


	15. A Phantom Menace

It’s all dark. The universe feels empty. Bodhi reaches out his hand but there’s nothing to hold onto. Nothing solid.

He feels a warmth on his cheek. It’s comforting. He babbles something nonsensical. The warmth retracts.

A different sensation. Like flying a ship without controls. It’s jerky, like one of the engines is malfunctioning.

He calls out, but no one answers.

_Luke_

******

Shara and Kes manage to drag Bodhi to a bunk in _The Falcon_ , but it’s little use. He’s gone somewhere. Dead weight.

Shara looks at her husband, scared of what this might mean for Bodhi, but also scared of what it might mean for them. For the Rebellion.

“He’ll be fine.” Kes tells her, half convinced.

He puts a hand to Bodhi’s forehead. More mumbling.

Shara huffed, temporarily defeated. The only thing coherent Bodhi’s said so far is— well, no use dwelling on idle gossip. Plenty of time for that later.

Chewie growled from another compartment. He’d been growing more and more distressed since _The Falcon_ landed over a standard hour ago. Now his growls seemed almost as defeated as Shara felt.

Kes was no doctor, but his role as pathfinder often saw him treating injuries in the field. And he was supremely gentle, which helped.

Shara watched her husband as he delicately adjusted Bodhi on the bunk— taking the tight goggles off his forehead and setting them near his outstretched hands.

It felt almost wrong separating Bodhi from his goggles, Kes thought to himself. He’d rarely seen the young pilot without them. They were part of his identity.

Unfortunately, his current state was also a deeply entrenched part of his identity.

Kes and Shara knew little about Bodhi’s past; only as much as they had been able to observe from his nervous ticks and occasional breakdowns.

But this seemed different.

The couple looked at each other, uncertain of their friend's future.

*******

His forehead felt lighter than it had been in a long time.

He never used to scowl so much. Waves of light flashed in his memory— a happy childhood with fireworks and silly whispers and warm hugs.

Now his forehead feels empty without worry.

He tries to reach out and touch it, but his hands find something first. A familiar shape, but abstract— as if from another life.

He withdraws his hand, but the movement seems to have attracted attention.

There are voices in the distance. Soft but drenched in worry.

He wants to help them. He just wants to help.

“I’m the pilot” he whispers into the void.

He doesn’t know why he says it, but it seems to be the right answer. The voices grow louder, more hopeful. He tries another.

“I brought— the message.”

He hears a word. Over and over. But it’s not just a word, it’s a name. His name.

_”Bodhi.”_

He lifts a heavy eyelid, grumbling vaguely.

“Come back to us.” A soft, male voice calls.

Warmth. This time on his shoulder. He flinches, but it doesn’t leave. He’s glad.

He opens his eyes, and two humanoid shapes appear in front of him. Kes and Shara.

“Welcome back, friend.” Shara smiles.

Bodhi tries to return a smile, but it’s far more of a grimace.

“What happened?” He asks, more to himself.

Kes gently helps him upright, hand still on his shoulder.

The couple looks at each other, clearly worried. But not just about him. He knows that. Why does he know that?

_Luke._

It comes flooding back to him, and for a moment he feels like he might collapse again.

Just as his eyesight begins to blur, a loud growl pulls him back into the moment.

Shara and Kes look toward the sound, but clearly even they are having trouble understanding what it means.

Bodhi tries to stand, tries to make a dash for the cockpit. It fails on all accounts.

But Kes and Shara are both standing now. Shara has a worried look. Kes is unreadable.

Chewie growls even louder— a deep guttural vibration.

This could be really good. The miracle they all need right now. But it could just as likely be a flaming ball of fire headed towards them from the nearest sun.

We really need lessons in Wookie, Bodhi thinks to himself.


	16. On Arrival

Mon Mothma looks anxious, her thin hands pulled tight to her side.

The others in the room glanced at her nervously. Their leader rarely shows signs of distress.

And still no word from the Princess.

******

The sirens drown out Chewbacca’s roar.

Something has set off Yavin IV’s satellite defenses.

Something is coming.

******

Bodhi picked himself up off the floor with help from Shara.

He didn’t even have time to be embarrassed.

He just needs to move. To get to Chewie. To see what was approaching.

_It has to be him. It has to be._

******

The space outside the central temple flooded with people.

 _Is this it_ , the crowd wondered.

_Is this the Empire’s retribution?_

Mon Mothma join Admiral Akbar and Senator Pamlo on a balcony high above the gathered crowd.

She had feared this. She knew it was coming.

She just hadn’t expected it so quickly.

******

Kes is already in the cockpit when Shara and Bodhi get there.

Chewbacca is still growling on and pointing to a light in the distance.

It was definitely a ship.

The alarms did not make it sound welcoming.

******

Senator Pamlo whispers to Akbar in a rushed voice. A voice filled with fear, but also resilience.

Mon Mothma didn’t hear the words. She just stood there, looking to the sky.

To death or salvation.

******

Bodhi’s heart sinks as the triangular shape of the Lambda shuttle takes form above him.

An Imperial shuttle.

The Imperial shuttle that Darth Vader had used just hours before.

Back when Luke was still alive. Back when there was hope.

******

A wide-eyed massager rushes at to balcony.

Senator Pamlo interrogated her before Mon Mothma has time to turn around.

“It’s them,” she said. “It’s the Princess.”

******

Shara looks to her husband as Bodhi sank to the floor.

“Surely they wouldn’t send one ship?” she said quietly. Almost to herself.

Kes looked doubtful as the shuttle landed.

“Maybe _he_ would.”

The sirens stopped abruptly.

No need for them now Kes thought.

Shara reached out to take his hand. At least they were together.

Suddenly, Bodhi shot straight up.

_“Luke”_

Kes and Shara looked at him, then each other, then the ship. The ramp hadn’t even been engaged. There was no way—

Bodhi dashed out of the cockpit faster than Shara had ever seen him move.

He was a survivor.

Bodhi ran and ran so fast he could no longer feel his legs.

The crowd was standing away from the shuttle, but all eyes were on it.

Bodhi paid no notice. He ran towards the shuttle. Fearless.

Steam hissed toward him as the ramp lowered in front of him. He was standing now, and a little less sure of himself.

_What if this was a trick? What if the ramp lowers and it’s Darth Vader?_

_What if I’m actually crazy?_ came a voice of doubt from the lower depths of his mind.

But the ramp did lower. And on the other side, there was no cyborg to meet him. Only a dirty, blooded former farmer who ran immediately towards him.

And before he knew what he was doing, Bodhi was kissing Luke Skywalker, savior of the galaxy, in front of a hundred or so people of every species imaginable.

And he was home.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Once again, very sorry for the inconsistent posting!
> 
> BUT the first half of my thesis is done, and I will have way more time to write now!
> 
> This one was fun. I hope you enjoyed it.


	17. Another Story

Away from the crowds and the chaos. Away from Mon Mothma’s bold declaration that the base would be abandoned within a month. And far far away from the panic of not knowing who or what would greet him in the shuttle…

Bodhi Rook was at peace.

After Leia had assured them that she and Han could make a full report, Bodhi and Luke had quickly retreated to Luke’s small but private room in the lowest level of the Temple. It was the best the Alliance had to offer.

Now Bodhi’s goggle-less head was resting on Luke’s chest as the hero of the galaxy prattled on and on about his latest adventure. Bodhi occasionally hummed in response, and it was enough.

“...my speeder went down and I thought I was done for. But of course, Leia and Han had somehow escaped the AT-AT and were…”

Bodhi clutched Luke’s undershirt tighter as he realized how close it had been. That is, until Luke nearly wacked him in the head imitating his lightsaber moves.

Luke had a gift for storytelling, but the combination of the leftover adrenaline and his sweeping hand motions were not ideal for cuddling.

But right now, holding Bodhi Rook close to him was the most important thing in the world. And Luke wasn’t about to let his rogue pilot go.

“So” Bodhi interjected.

It was the first time Bodhi had really spoken since Skywalker and crew had returned, and Luke looked at him in half-relief, half-delight. 

“You’re a Jedi now?”

The delight melted from Luke’s face in an instant. His blue eyes looked away in avoidance, but at least he didn’t loosen his grip.

Bodhi quickly added “I mean, I’ve heard the rumors. And the voices in my head. But I didn’t—“

“No” Luke interrupted him quietly. “I’m not a Jedi… If I learned anything from today, it’s that.”

Bodhi frowned.

“But you do have the Force?”

He thought back to Chirrut. We all have the Force. But clearly Luke had it more than others.

“Yeah” Luke said, now seeming a million lightyears away even tho they shared a bed.

Bodhi loosened his grip on Luke. Maybe he needed some space.

But Luke sensed Bodhi’s hesitation, and gently wrapped his arms around him.

Bodhi didn’t even flinch, which made him smile softly.

Luke thought it was the most beautiful thing he’d ever seen.

He reached his head up to kiss him— gently at first but then with more longing.

Luke broke the kiss a little too soon for Bodhi’s liking. He was looking at Bodhi with a serious face, as if he had just made a decision.

“I have to go” he said simply.

Bodhi’s heart dropped.

“When the Alliance leaves Yavin, I can’t go with them. Not right away.”

Bodhi’s muscles loosened a bit after hearing that. At least it wasn’t now. At least they still had time.

“I want you to come with me.”

Bodhi didn’t hesitate. “Where will we go?”

Luke smiled.

“To the planet where I was raised. Tatooine.”


	18. One Last Question

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bodhi prepares to fly to Luke's homeworld on a secret mission.
> 
> He just has one question first.

“It’s Luke fucking Skywalker— of course you should go!” Shara half-yelled from across the table.

Kes moved to put a moderating hand on her shoulder, but smiled nonetheless. “I agree,” he said simply.

Bodhi looked down at his caf and sighed heavily. “I just answered ‘yes’ so fast... I don’t even know why we’re going.”

“Probably some top-secret Jedi stuff” Shara fake-whispered conspiratorially. Bodhi frowned more. He wasn’t even sure what _that_ would entail.

Wedge, who had been uncharacteristically silent since the conversation started, finally looked up from his breakfast.

“I agreed with Bodhi. This is all too fast. Especially with Biggs bein...”

The whole table looked confused as Wedge stopped dead in his tracks. He choked like he had just swallowed his tongue.

“Biggs who? What are you talking about?” Shara asked.

Wedge didn’t acknowledge the question; he simply turned to Bodhi and said,

“Ask him.”

*******

Bodhi often felt like a ghost walking around the Yavin base. On Mon Mothma’s orders, they were finally starting to evacuate the vulnerable moon, but it was a slow and painful process. He walked quietly by as humans and aliens of every sort hauled container after container of weapons, supplies, and nonperishables into the bustling cargo bay.

No one paid much attention to him, which usually made him grateful. But today it was serving as a poor distraction to the sick feeling in his stomach.

He made his way towards through the throngs and around ancient temple’s base, unsure where his feet were taking him. And when they finally stopped, he regretted granting them any level of autonomy.

On the north side of the temple, carved out of the same stone, stood a relief of Rogue One: heroes of the Battle of Scarif.

In the middle stood Casian, face serious and blaster raised. Beside him was Jyn, who looked to be smirking slightly. Bodhi thought it suited her. To their right were Chirrut and Baze, leaning on each other for all of eternity. Bodhi felt that was proper too.

Then on the left. K2, towering over them all. And the carved image of Bodhi Rook— the Imperial turned defector turned pilot. One sole survivor of two Death Star blasts.

There was so much more to the story than them. So many who had given their lives who would never be named or immortalized. Bodhi thought mostly of Galen, without whom he would still be an Imperial and everyone around him would likely be dead.

He hated coming here.

Even with all he had endured for the Alliance in the past month, he still felt like it was never enough. He was a fraud until proven innocent, and somehow he couldn’t prove it to himself no matter how hard he tried.

The beeping of an astromech stirred him from his quiet reflection. He looked down to see R2-D2. Because of course.

He leaned down to the droids eye-level and smiled. He had done well with the repairs. His fingers swept over a scuff on the droid’s dome head, applying pressure until it smoothed out. At least he’d gotten this right.

R2 beeped and booped again, clearly impatient with his reflective mood.

“Ok, R2. Ok. Where is he?”

*******

Luke Skywalker’s golden hair was Bodhi’s favorite sight in the universe. The flyboy was staring out a window in one of the base’s few temporary structures that hadn’t been relocated.

The sun washed over his face. As Bodhi’s grew closer, he realized Luke’s eyes were closed.

 _Maybe he’s meditating? Like Chirrut used to do._ Bodhi thought he should go.

Luke stirred suddenly, as if he sensed a disruption. He smiled at Bodhi in the way only Luke Skywalker could smile— the sun still lighting half his face as he turned.

“Thanks for coming.”

Bodhi looked at him wordlessly. Like he wasn’t about to travel halfway across the galaxy with him; no questions asked.

Well... maybe just one.

“I actually had a question for you.”

Luke, still smiling, said with absolute sincerity, “Anything.”

“Who’s Biggs?”

Luke’s smile dropped. He looked at the ground. Bodhi suddenly felt like he had just punched the man in the gut. He stepped forward to apologize for asking, it was really none of his business, but Luke brought a hand up to his shoulder.

“Biggs was a fighter pilot. Red Squadron. He died during the attack on the Death Star.”

He paused. Bodhi didn’t know what to say.

“He—“ Luke continued, “We were together for a while back on Tatooine. Years ago. Before the war. He joined the Rebellion while I had to stay and played farmer.”

Bodhi understood. “You were a couple.”

Luke smiled fondly, as if he was having a vision of some distant past. “I was obsessed with him. Followed him around everywhere. He was always in the middle of everything, and I wanted to be there too.” He looked down at the ground. “I guess now I am.”

Bodhi took the pilot’s hand.

“I’m sorry.” 

Luke looked him straight in the eyes.

“You have nothing to be sorry for. I’m just glad I found you.”

That smile returned. Still so young and full of hope— even after all he’d seen.

“Are you ready to fly?” Luke asked.

Bodhi had never said “no” to that…


	19. Take Me Home

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After a fearsome brush with Darth Vader, Luke Skywalker returns to his home planet in search of answers about his old friend Ben and the Jedi of the Old Republic.
> 
> Bodhi Rook is just happy to be along for the ride.
> 
> Things do not go as planned.

“‘There’s nothing here for me now,’ that’s what I said when I left this place” Luke pondered aloud as the pair made their way toward the endless sands of Tatooine. “Let’s hope I was wrong.” 

Bodhi placed a hand on the pilot’s shoulder. “I’m sure there is.”

R2-D2 beeped in affirmative.

Luke sighed. “Ok. Let’s do this.”

******

The journey to Old Ben’s house was long and treacherous. The sand whipped all around them, and the twin suns scorched the planet mercilessly.

It reminded Bodhi of home.

“So what are we looking for exactly?” he asked through the folds of cloth that covered most of his face and head.

Luke, looking graceful as ever in a robe and simple hood, nodded towards a ridge up ahead. “Ben’s house shouldn’t be much farther. I have no clue what we’ll find there, exactly. Probably nothing. But everything I know of the Force—which isn’t much— I know from Ben.”

Luke paused, as if he didn’t know whether to continue. “I hear him sometimes. I know that sounds crazy but—“

Bodhi stopped in his tracks. “It doesn’t to me.”

Luke smiled at him, bewildered.

“If your voice is in my head from lightyears away, why can’t this Ben be reaching out to you? Everything about the Force seems impossible. But then you live with it, and nothing seems impossible.”

Luke nodded. “I feel like he still has so much to teach me. I don’t know why he doesn’t just _tell_ me what to do next or where to—“

_EEEERRRHHHRRRRGGEEE!!!_

An inhuman shriek suddenly echoed through the valley and stopped them dead in their tracks. Up ahead, a robbed monster, the likes of which Bodhi had never seen before, stood screaming with a staff raised above its head.

R2 let out a panicked squeal as Luke positioned himself in front of both Bodhi and the droid. The hum of his icy blue lightsaber was so close Bodhi could almost feel its deadly heat.

“Sand people” Luke said with disgust before charging it.

He took the loud one out with one swift stroke, but more could be heard up the ridge.

Luke looked back and Bodhi and R2, panicked. “That’s _Ben’s_ house!”

******

Luke was over the ridge in a flash as his two friends struggled to keep up with him. “NO! Get away from there!” he shouted while waving his saber wildly.

Fortunately, Sand People are easily frightened. They ran from him before he even was close enough to strike.

Luke looked almost helpless as Bodhi caught up to him, lightsaber still drawn. “If they hadn’t run… I might’ve” He looked down at the sand.

“I’m just glad they ran,” Bodhi said honestly.

Luke kicked the side of the adobe structure that once housed his friend. “All I feel is anger and frustration. Something tells me that’s not the path to becoming a Jedi.”

Bodhi reached around Luke’s waist to hold him from behind. Luke turned off his lightsaber and leaned into him.

Luke sighed. “I need answers, Bodhi. Let's hope Ben left us a few.”

Bodhi tightened his grip for a moment, and then released it to walk into the structure. Looking around at the rubble that was once a home, Bodhi groaned. “Suddenly, I’m not so hopeful…" 

Luke muttered some curse under his breath as he and R2 entered the dim room. “It doesn’t look like those… people made off with much,” Bodhi said as if there was much to take. The room was filthy and covered in dust and sand.

Luke nodded. “Look around, Artoo, and see if you can find anything interesting.”

As the droid swept the walls and crude furniture with his light sensor, Bodhi mostly looked at the things scattered on the ground. So much sand.

Almost to himself, Luke pondered, “Why do you think Ben spent all those years out here in the middle of nowhere? After everything… the Clone Wars, the Empire… why Tatooine? Why—”

R2 suddenly made a squeal as his sensors detected something interesting, alright. A leather-bound package that read, “For Luke” in Aurebesh.

“For Luke” he repeated aloud, smiling in wonder. This was it. “Bodhi, this is—"

A sharp swooping sound fills the air, and before any of them could even react, a tall, green-helmeted figure rushes into the entrance and tosses a thermal detonator into the room.

It all happens too quickly. Luke draws his lightsaber, but what good is that against a bomb? R2 beeps panicked beeps, and Bodhi Rook rushes toward the detonator.

And falls.

Just as it explodes.

Luke and R2 are thrown by the blast, but its destructive power has been dampened. Luke screams. R2 lays still.

Boba Fett moves into the room, gun at his side, believing he has bested them.

Luke rushes at the bounty hunter with all his might and swings his lightsaber wildly. He is disoriented by the blast and by his rage and sadness. Fett barely dodges the blade and rockets back into the sky. His mission unfulfilled.

Luke looks back into the room. It is spinning. On the floor, lay his fallen love. Bodhi Rook: a hero ’til the end.

Luke holds him his arms and cries. Muttering nonsense. R2 at his side.

They had just begun. There was nothing in the universe that could heal this. Nothing that could make it fair.

Nothing.

Tatooine had taken so much from him. Its sands had swallowed too many bodies already. He would not let it take one more. He gathered his lightsaber, which he had discarded on the ground, Old Ben’s gift to him, and the body of Bodhi Rook. And he vowed never to return.

This was no longer home, and he could not make any more sacrifices for it.

******

Somewhere in the mire of the Force, Bodhi Rook is at peace.

He had finished it; he had died a hero's death at the hands of a thermal detonator.

Somehow he always knew it was his fate, and when he dodged it first, he could not understand.

Now he did.

The Force had given him time. Time to heal. Time to grow. Time to fall in love.

Had he died on Scarif, he would have died a broken man. A soldier whose brief time in the Rebellion was marked by only tragedy and pain.

The Force had granted him a different ending.

He had died much the same, but in a manner befitting his good heart.

It was not the thermal detonator that had defeated him; it was **he** who defeated the detonator.

And he had done it for love. Not obligation. Not duty. Not guilt or sorrow or hopelessness. Luke Skywalker would save the galaxy. He believed that. And he had saved Luke Skywalker.

Bodhi melded into the Force-- happy to call it home.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It has been so so long since I thought about this story, but I want to give Bodhi and Luke the ending they deserve. Sorry it had to be so tragic.


	20. Epilogue

_*A FEW MONTHS LATER_ _ABOVE MAKO-TA*_

 

“We’re all outta options,” Wedge sighed as he plopped down on a crate next to his astromech. He was frustrated and angry, but mostly he was scared.

When Queen Trios had offered to aid the Rebels, it had seemed like things were finally turning around. Orbiting above Mako-Ta was a fleet of beautifully engineered Mon Calamari ships— enough to really make a difference.

But the queen had betrayed the Alliance. Their comms had been cut off, their fighters were trapped inside the sabotaged ships, and their new fleet was sitting helpless against Imperial bombardment.

Luke and Wedge were trapped onboard an alien ship with a handful of X-wing pilots he scarcely knew.

Wedge was not taking it well, and Luke couldn’t blame him.

It had been a hard few months. The death of Bodhi had just been the beginning. The Empire’s retaliation against the Rebels had not been immediate, but now it was in full-force. And it was deadly.

Luke missed so many things in Bodhi’s absence— his shy smile, the way he adjusted his goggles when he was nervous, his soft hands— but he missed his courage most of all.

He had been through so much. Even more than Luke knew, probably. Although after seeing the ruins of Jedha in person, it was hard to imagine how. Yet the pilot had remained so brave. Flying dangerous missions. Accompanying him to his homeworld, no questions asked. Saving his life. Sacrificing his own.

A crash disrupted Luke’s thoughts, as he and Wedge instinctively moved toward the source of the commotion. By the look in Wedge’s eyes, he too feared it was an enemy boarding party.

Instead, they found a golden protocol droid.

“ _Threepio_ , what are you doing here?! How did you—“

“Oh, Master Luke! You won’t believe the trouble I’ve gone through! Why, I am surprised I—“

Wedge gave Luke a pointed Luke. They were running out of time.

“Threepio. Do you have any _news_? What’s happening out there?”

“Oh, yes! Mistress Leia sent me to you with a VERY important mission! She says that the hanger doors are programmed to open if they sense an imminent collision— even if they are otherwise disabled!”

Luke looked at Wedge with a flash of hope. They finally had a way out!

Wedge was more hesitant. “Luke, for all we know— we’ll fly at those doors and get smashed to smithereens! Think about this.”

Luke looked him dead in the eyes. “I have. But this is our only option. If we don’t leave now, the Imperial fighters will pick off our fleet one-by-one until there’s nothing left. We can’t let that happen. We just have to have faith that what Leia’s saying is true.”

“Oh, I assure you, Master Lu—“

“Alright,” Wedge interrupted. “I’ll get the team ready. They aren’t Red Squadron, but they’re good pilots. Good people.”

“Thanks, Wedge.” Luke said, sounding more confident than he felt. “Threepio, you’re with me.”

C-3PO followed closely behind, protesting all the way. “But where am I to sit in an X-wing? It is only designed to accommodate—“

“Don’t worry,” Luke smiled. “There’s a storage compartment on the underside. You’ll fit.”

“A storage compartment!?” Threepio gasped. But he got in all the same.

After all the fighters had assembled, Luke took a moment to reflect. One deep breathe.

He clutched the goggles he always kept in the cockpit for good luck. The goggles he had selfishly denied Bodhi in the afterlife. But he needed a physically reminder of Bodhi’s presence more than he’d readily to admit.

Now more than ever.

“Alright, crew” he said as he switched his short-range comms on. “This is it. We fly at that door and we don’t blink.”

This is what Bodhi must have felt like flying onto Scarif, knowing that all the odds were against him. Knowing he might not come back.

But he did come back. He survived. And they would too.

“This is _Rogue Squadron_. All vessels, **now!** ”

He closed his eyes as the doors slid open. When he opened them, he could see Mako-Ta and the fleet and the stars. Once again, there was hope.

He breathed a silent thanks to Bodhi Rook, then sped after the nearest TIE.


End file.
